Is It Raining Where You Are
by Don't Trust the Snake
Summary: "Do you ever miss me? Do you ever regret what you've done? Do you ever stand in the rain and hope that the water will wash away all the guilt and pain and anger? Does it ever work?" Oneshot involving Naruto's feelings about rain and Sasuke.


I like the rain. I always have, actually. Even if it makes me kind of sad sometimes. The rain is just…cleansing. Whenever it rains I feel as if all my imperfections are washed away, and I feel as if I can soar.

I can't, of course. But the rain helps me believe that maybe I could, if I just tried hard enough.

Do you ever wish you could fly?

Never mind. You can, can't you? You and your cursed seal. Heh. I never did like your wings, though. They didn't seem to fit you. I kind of miss seeing them, though. Because if I saw them, I would be seeing you as well.

Do you like the rain? I don't actually know. There are a lot of things I don't know about you. I always claim to be the one who knows you the best, but while there isn't anyone who knows you better—except perhaps your brother that you want to kill—there are times I don't think I know you at all. You seem like a person who would like rain, though.

But maybe I'm wrong. I think I'm wrong a lot.

If you were here, you would roll you eyes and mutter, "_Dobe."_

_Teme…_

You aren't here, though. I don't know where you are.

But I'll find you one day.

Maybe.

Sometimes I wonder if I actually believe that you'll come back. You always were stubborn beyond belief. Heh. So many memories.

I've been sitting in the rain for a long time. I don't think I'll get sick, though. And I don't want to go inside yet.

Have you ever sat in the rain? It's something I could easily see you doing. You would be sitting crossed-legged, on the ground, or on a roof, or somewhere else. Your hands would be on your knees, face tipped up towards the cloudy sky. You would be taking deep, even breaths, not too many, not too few, and your eyes would shiver under your eyelids when a particularly large drop of water would hit them. You would look strangely peaceful, but still hard. Maybe a little sad…

Do you ever have a hard time holding in tears? Or is it easy for you, to keep that impassive exterior of yours?

It's hard for me.

It's easier when it's raining. That's because I pretend that the drops of rain are all the tears I'll never cry.

A lot of those tears are for you.

I wonder if you could understand how much I miss you.

I miss you so much that it _hurts._

Do you ever miss me? Do you ever regret what you've done? Do you ever stand in the rain and hope that the water will wash away all the guilt and the pain and the anger? Does it ever work?

Maybe if I had tried harder, you would still be here. Maybe it's all my fault.

I'm so tired right now. Tired of everything.

Do you get tired?

You know, sometimes I'm surprised that the hole in my chest isn't physical. I feel like I can reach right through myself, where my heart should be. Sometimes I flinch when people look at me, because I'm afraid that they'll see the huge, gaping space where part of me is missing. They can't see it, of course. Only I know it's there.

Can't you understand that I _care_? You're my _friend_! Can't you see that? Do you _know _how much it _hurts?_

…

I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lose control.

It just hurts.

It hurts really bad.

You have a brother. Unless you've already killed him. But you know what it feels like to have a brother. I _think_ I know what it feels like. I think it feels like this.

I wish that I could wish you luck, but now that I've thought about it, I don't think that you should do it. If you kill him, he'll be gone. Your brother. Your brother will be gone forever. He'll _never_ _come back. _You would lose him, and it would all be your fault.

I didn't want to lose _my_ brother. Do you really want to lose yours?

Do you think of me as a brother? As a friend? A rival? Do you think of me at all?

_This hurts so much._

The rain isn't helping. The rain is supposed to help. I'm not supposed to cry when it's raining. It's supposed to stop me from crying.

Stupid tears. I hate crying.

I wish you would come back.

I'm so afraid you won't.

If you die, I'm dying too, I hope you know that.

I hope you care…

But I'm afraid that you don't.

Why does it have to hurt so much? It makes it hard to breathe, hard to think, hard to live.

Is it raining where you are? Do you ever think of me? Do you ever hurt?

It's raining harder than ever here. All the tears from the sky…

I hope it never stops.


End file.
